How To Determine Your Will vs. Higher Will

by Melody Jean

Many people struggle with this very notion. How to determine what’s in their control and what they must leave up to a greater Will, if you will.

It’s become much easier for me to ascertain, but it came from years of trial and error. There’s a difference between what we can do and what we need to let the “big man upstairs” handle.

Our Will

So what is our Will? I like to think of it as those things I can control. Within my grasp are elements such as my education, career choice, friends I keep, what I eat, when I go to sleep, whether I exercise, who I date, etc.  I think being able to discern what we have control over has to do with remaining realistic. I also think that we are born with this ability – it is innate to a certain extent.

In examining my own behavior in relation to this I realize that for the most part, I can formulate an idea and determine the steps necessary to get there. I can also proactively set about putting the plan into action. Why I am able to do this, is because of those reasons I mention, it’s an inner capacity that I was born with and I remain realistic in that I make sure it’s achievable to some degree. I don’t set-out for the big time. For example rather than aspire to become a famous lyrical composer, I might seek to get a poem or a lyrical piece published in a local paper. If this worked well, and there was an interest, I might then try for a regional publication, then a national, and so forth. And what if it wasn’t published? Depending how strongly I felt I would likely work to find a place where perhaps I could share it with some who might find it of interest. Much like I do with this blog.

Higher Will & Design: The Biggies Are Set … But Not In Stone

My dad said to me one time that if I could imagine my life here like a design or like a maze almost. There are elements along the way that perhaps might be predetermined such as:

I’m born –> I will get married –> I will have children –> I will die.

While I do not know for sure what those “set” elements include (other than I’m born and will die), for the sake of this, let’s assume it’s those listed above. Let’s entertain this idea too that our designs are established in a way that we can influence most of these (aside from being born and dying) in some way. For example, if above holds true, my design or higher Will intends for me to get married. So if that is the case, what if I decide (my Will) to date someone who is absolutely against marriage and all it stands for? While he assures me that he will date me until the day he passes on, he absolutely under no circumstances will marry me. So knowing this about him, do I continue to date him, or let him go? How do I know that my design intends for me to officially pledge my love to one man via the legal system of marriage? I don’t know. I just don’t, because the “set” items in our design are a mystery to lower consciousness. It’s our higher consciousness or Will that knows this, well I think anyway. So since I want to marry, I’m going on a hunch, or what I want, or feel that I need and deserve. Some say “the hunch” is really your intuition. Or could it be my higher Will?

The Difference

I intuitively can determine the difference at this point, but still struggle with knowing when to turn my Will over to higher Will. Many have difficulty with even trying to discern the difference in Wills. The biggest difference I think between our Will and higher Will is that which we can control. We need to stop and think about what in our life is controllable. Whether I marry is a great example because I don’t solely control if, or when, I actually marry because it involves another human being. Yet, I do control who I date and dating leads to marriage  – well in most cases 😉

A little tidbit to ponder and there is so much more to explore on this. If you’ve read this far you may also find of interest the post, Trusting in Our Higher Will.

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{ 2 comments… read them below or add one }


Great topic. There are days I think I have a glimpse (love that word) of the divine will and then there are most days when I don’t have a clue. It is our task to strive (of course, where did the impulse to strive come from?) but we may never truly know the results of our striving. I think of your dad’s book on Johnny Appleseed. We never know which seeds will blossom, when, where and to what effect.


Melody Jean

I agree Mike regarding my dad’s story and your other points. There is so much to say, think, and experience regarding Will. Over the years I have gotten better at determining when I am using my Will, or should do so. Yet, the harder, more challenging part is when to know when enough is enough and to trust in your higher Will. Turn over the reigns so to speak and just take a break from it all. Thanks for your thoughts on this; very helpful!


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