Zen and the Art of Acknowledging and Forgiving

by Melody Jean

Zen and the Art of Acknowledging and Forgiving Contemporary SeekerWhen we feel a certain way, it’s best to acknowledge it.

Don’t bury it, nor put it on a pedestal.

Don’t try to talk yourself out of it, and don’t feed it too much either.

What Not To Do:

  1. Don’t Bury It

Don’t go seeking endless uplifting quotes or mantras via social media to try to make yourself feel the opposite of how you’re really feeling.

This is essentially lying to yourself, and your subconscious wants you to do this. It doesn’t want you to deal with the hurt, anger and resentment. Your subconscious doesn’t want you to feel the pain.

Yet, if you ignore it, you are just burying it deeper. This type of behavior really just masks your feelings temporarily. And this, my friends, can actually stunt your spiritual and emotional growth.

  1. Don’t Lift-It Up

However, on the flipside you also don’t want to feed the monster too much either.

Curling up in a ball screaming and crying could be okay, if it’s for a day or so.

You don’t want to continue to feed the lion, for that lion can come back and eat you 🙂

Dwelling is just as detrimental to spiritual and emotional progress as is denying the feelings, which I mentioned prior.

What’s the Remedy?

So then, just exactly how do you handle off-putting feelings?

You recognize what is transpiring. Be one with it.

For example, if angry at someone or hurt by him or her, you can recognize it in your heart. You might even think, or say it out loud to yourself, “Okay, that pissed the shiat out of me. Wow, I’m mad (or hurt).”

You can embrace the feeling, let it be. Know you feel it and further, know that it is okay.

Once you “own it,” perhaps you might pray (or ask) for the strength to move beyond it, in a healthy way.

I will use myself as an example.

Myself – Case in Point

Because of the juncture where I currently reside on my spiritual path, I’m releasing elements that I don’t need anymore with a vengeance. As a result, I recently realized how hurt and resentful I am of something that transpired.

These feelings, and the person associated, came to the surface. I had no choice but to deal with it. You see, originally I buried it deep down. It was easier than facing it at the time.

Therefore, I have been sitting with it the last few days. I have become one with these feelings. Yet, tonight, I know it’s time to let it go. I don’t need it anymore.

With that I am ready to move on. As part of that process, I’m also ready to forgive.

The reason I’m ready to forgive? Well, it’s for me. Forgiving feels better. Regardless of whether the other is aware I’ve granted forgiveness, that I do not care.

In the process of forgiving I wrote this poem below, which I will leave you with.


How About I Forgive You?

Maybe I should try to forgive you

It’s my soul that it will free


How about I nod in acceptance

And walk in the moonlight one more time


Maybe I can find some semblance of adoration

In the evening hours through the hazy stars


Wandering the catacombs of my sublime

I’m guessing where it will lead


So it’s here that I finally forgive you

To set my soul a flight and free


I no longer hold the undone in my heart

Rather I walk with angels as is my destiny

{ 2 comments… read them below or add one }


Thank you again for writing this. Somehow it always seems so timely.


Melody Jean

you’re welcome. glad they resonate — makes sharing worth it 🙂


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